An Expat's Wife's Prayer

Expat's Wife's prayer

Heavenly Father, look down on us, your humble obedient expat
wives who are doomed to travel this earth following our loved
ones through their working lives to lands unknown. We beseech
you, oh Lord, to see that our plane is not hijacked or doesn't
crash, our luggage is not lost or pillaged and our overweight
baggage goes unnoticed.

Give us this day divine guidance in our selection of houses,
maids and drivers. We pray that the telephone works, the
roof does not leak, the power cuts are few and the rats and
cockroaches even fewer.

Lord, please lead us to good, inexpensive restaurants where
wine is included in the meal and the food does not cause
dysentery. Have mercy upon us Lord if it be the latter, make
us fleet of foot, to make the loo in time, and strong of knee in
case we have to squat. Also give us the wisdom to tip correctly
in currencies we do not understand.

Make the natives love us Lord for who we are and not for what
we can contribute to their worldly goods. Grant us the strength
to smile at our maids, even though our most treasured dress
resembles a rag or they take bleach to clean our well-admired
Persian rug.

Dear God, protect us from so-called "bargains" we don't need
and can't afford. Lead us not into temptation for we know not
what we do.

Almighty Father, keep our husbands from looking at foreign
women and comparing them to us. Save them from making
fools of themselves in nightclubs. Above all, please do not
forgive their trespasses for they know exactly what they do.

And when our expat years are over Lord, grant us the favor
of finding someone who will look at our photographs and listen
to our stories, so our lives as expat wives will not have been in
vain.

Amen

(author unknown)